By Lois Hewitt

I had a dream last night about a young lady in a not very good situation.  She had made some poor life choices and was feeling hopeless about her future.

Then two men showed up wanting her hand. One man was a good man but not very bright. The other man was very street smart but not at all nice.

In my dream she struggled with this very important choice she had to make, a choice that could change the course of her life.

She ultimately chose the not so nice man. Because all of her experiences told her she did not deserve anything better.

I happened to be in the dream (weird, right?) And I walked up to the man she chose and got right in his face and told him he had one choice, that was to be a better person. I said in my most authoritative voice.  She deserved better, so be better.

When I woke up I thought for a moment about the world we live in today. Life should be better by now. We have all kinds of technology and an infinite amount of knowledge at our fingertips.  We can go and do and see so many things.

But we have lost our ability to be kind to each other even if we don’t agree with them.  As time rolls on, we begin to think we don’t deserve kindness.  Then there is a collective sigh and we are covered in indifference and hopelessness.

We all can do better.  We all can be better. We can give and get respect. We can all start working together instead of just for ourselves.  The fighting and bickering has to stop.

We are a world in crisis and we need each other to get through this. And yes, we need God.

He calls us all to do better and to be better. Together we stand… you know the rest of the saying.  Let’s come together and be better today and from this day forward.

By Lois Hewitt

OCD makes it difficult for me to accept change. I like when I have worked through a system of doing things.  It comforts me.

But I have had to learn that nothing stays the same for too long.  I remember the day a few years ago that I proclaimed I would never set foot in a kitchen again. I hated cooking and was not going to do it ever again.

I did just that for about 2 years. I only ate fast food or processed meals already made. 

Then one day, I realized the toll that decision took on my health and my wallet.  I slowly started cooking again now it is one thing that brings me immense joy.

Nothing stays the same…especially when you add the word never into the proclamation.

I went from a point of brokenness (I did not even care enough to nourish my body) to a point where I care about what actually nourishes me.

We can all look back on our lives and see similar examples of change in our lives. I could write a book on all the things in my life that have changed.

What’s my point you may ask.  Just this…if you are feeling stuck in a bad place, remember it is going to change. I was stuck in the “desert” for a very long time, due to my own pride and stubbornness. But it eventually changed.

I thought God had left me alone and no longer heard my prayers. But He never left, He just waited until I was stronger and a little smarter before He made my change happen.

If you are wondering where your better day is, it is coming. I lived wishing to just not exist any longer to a place of real peace. I never dreamed it would happen but it did. Hang on, your change is coming. God has not abandoned you.  His timeframe is not like ours.

Praying for my friends and family today for patience during the waiting season.  Keep looking up and it will keep you from falling down. 

By Lois Hewitt

The other day I saw something on FB that made me very upset. I then started to write a scathing reply to what I had read from a person I did not know.  I stood my ground with every emotion-filled word I could think of.  I wrote how they were wrong in their assumptions of an entire group of people and that the words they so carelessly wrote were not helping the world today.

Then I thought for a moment. Odds are that person will never read my rant.  And was I much different from them in my ranting?

The volleyball game we are all playing with words, assumptions, generalizations and a touch of anger are not helping to heal this very unhealthy society we are living in.

Scolding someone for mean posts is not going to change that person from believing what they believe. They happened to believe that all conservatives were inbred. I happen to know for a fact that is not true.

So how do we change views like that and other seriously hurtful ideals without demonstrating the same attributes?

I truly believe in my God and His Son.  I know the power that changed my life. But if I stand on a soapbox with a big rock and scream incoherently my views while hitting them over the head, have I made anything better? Attacking their attack seemed like a path I did not want to go down.

Then you think silence is the answer.  That is not true because silence can be interpreted as agreement. I have been silent in the past and the results are not good.

God calls us to love one another. I have to be honest, it is hard for me to love someone who says absolutely horrible things about God or who calls me an inbred or any number of other phrases used so commonly today.

Is being kind the answer?  After a stop at CVS the other day, I barely encountered a kind person.  All were mad and short in their tone.  Impatient is the new norm.  Would kindness counter all that rage?  I am just not sure.

Jerry Springer used to end each of his hate-filled circus acts of a show with some very profound words. “Take care of each other.”

It’s what we are called to do. I have to work everyday on not becoming the person I am fighting to not be.  Anger is the worst disease because it is so very contagious and spreads so fast. Prayer is my vaccination against it so I will continue to pray for this world that is so hard to love. I will take care of who I can and be compassionate even if I have to bite my tongue.

I have said it before, this life is hard. We can all do better and I will pray for the strength to be better.

PS. It just came to me, a truth I should have known…i cannot make the changes on my own, only through God’s light through me.

By Lois Hewitt

The sun rises in its glory every morning.  Yet we forget to see it.

A butterfly dances in the yard from flower to flower.  Yet we forget to see it.

Blessings surround us and abound in us.  Yet we forget to see it.

Many of us live each day as if it were a race.  Get up, race to work, race to get the work done, race home, race to bed and do it again tomorrow.

Many of us live on a treadmill where our only view is what’s ahead. We forget to stop.

The stop is where you see the sun rise or the raindrops.  The stop is where you hear the silence. The stop is where you feel the wind graze your skin.  The stop is where life is.

It’s hard to stop, isn’t it?  We might miss a deadline or a commitment.  I have found as I get older, never knew this in my youth, that it’s the stops that feed the soul.

It’s ok to slow down.  It’s ok to catch your breath. Work is important but so too is rest.  We cannot live by busyness alone.

Allow yourself to enjoy something beautiful today, my friend.  Feed your soul and drink in God’s glory. It will do you good!

By Lois Hewitt

I haven’t had much to say lately. No inspiration has come my way. Then last night I had a dream about a road we drove on during our long journey to find a new life.

The road is a long two-lane blacktop in the southwest, maybe Arizona. When we drove it seemed to go on forever.

In the dream I am driving on this road and I look in the rearview mirror. Where I have been looks small and far away. I remember where I had been and the experience but it wasn’t my main focus.

The road ahead was pretty straightforward but I could never be sure what I would encounter way up and I knew eventually the road would stop being straight and I would experience twists and turns but it wasn’t my main focus.

The part I needed to concentrate on was where I was in that moment. The past only offered experiences already had. The future was totally unsure. But where I was in the moment was the priority.

In the moment I had choices. I could leave the road and get lost in the desert. I could stop and not make any progress. Or I could stay on the road and remember the past, look forward to the future and live in the lane I was in.

I have lived looking in the rearview mirror. That is a troubling way to live. So many things done wrong, so many missed opportunities and so many loved ones that are so very missed.

I have lived waiting for that elusive better time to come. The corner you turn and everything changes. I have spent years waiting and waiting for the future to become the present. But it never quite turns out how I thought it would.

Now I live in the moment I am in. I remember lessons from the past and have anticipation for things to come. But I realize now that I can’t do anything about either one of those. But I do have my hands on the wheel right now. So I pray for guidance and try not to go off the road. I am learning to enjoy the scenery right now. Because soon it will be part of my past.

Right now, my friend, is all we have. Nothing we can do can change the past and nothing we can do can cement the future. Right now is our focus. It may be good or it may not be, but we will all eventually drive through it into a new right now. 

Hang on to faith, it will give you strength. Hang on to grace, it will ease your pain.  Hang on to God, He will be faithful to you, He promises. Life is a journey, good and bad.  Enjoy the smooth roads and endure the bumps. God is with you always!

By Lois Hewitt

I can’t believe I got duped! It’s all my fault but it happened. I only needed a few groceries. I usually shop on line at Whole Foods but this week I wanted to go a little cheaper. So I run into the discount grocery (mistake 1) and go to the oil section, which isn’t brightly lit. Grab a bottle that says largely on the label Extra Virgin Olive Oil. I look at the price and it comparable to the 365 Brand I usually buy, so I assume it’s ok (mistake 2). Also, the label looks similar to a big name brand (mistake 3). I throw it in my basket and grab a few more things. I get home and start dinner and I see the label. It says only 20% olive oil. Turns out it’s sunflower oil which is highly inflammatory and something I always avoid.

Manufacturers do these tricks so that busy consumers do not notice the shortcuts they have taken. We need to remember that Big Farm is only concerned with big profits and shareholder dividends. Why else would the new food chart show Lucky Charms as a healthy whole grain.

We all have to look out for the foods we eat. No one else cares what you and your family eat as long as the money keeps coming in.

I know it’s a lot of work. I do. I spend a whole lot of time thinking about food ingredients and studying additives and such. Not everyone has the time or inclination.

If you want to eat healthier, you have to read labels. There is no way around it. I’m fairly good at that and I got tricked because I did not look close enough at the label.

I’m not preaching, I just get so angry that for years, decades really, we trusted people and companies we should not have with our health. They just don’t care.

I was using a cane to walk a few years ago, I was so weak and anemic. My diet was pure poison. I changed it completely and it’s like night and day now. No cane. No anemia.

My point…this is important. Please be careful with what you buy. Be your own advocate.

I know food is expensive. My experience has been once I cut out the processed food, I had more room for better foods. Plus I batch cook…but that is for another day.

Food can either heal us or kill us.

By Lois Hewitt

A lot of my adult life has been spent working in offices. But many times I worked second or third jobs as my spending was out of control.  Most of those extra jobs were in retail or restaurants.  I never gave much thought to the purpose of those jobs until yesterday…

I had to pick up a prescription at my local CVS yesterday.  I had been putting off going as I get anxious in that parking lot because it’s so busy. Sure enough I got cut off and yelled at for trying to find a parking space while annoying the person honking at me.

I finally park and go inside.  I’m praying I have enough money to pay.  The store is very busy. I get to the pharmacy and the line is long. So I wait.

My turn comes and I see a young girl heading my way and I actually see her body get rigid as she sees me.  All of a sudden her guard is up.  I give her my information. She gets my prescription and I count out my singles and pay (I had enough!).

When I left I thanked her for her help and you could tell she relaxed. She even smiled at me.

When I got home, I thought about that encounter and just shrugged it off.  I was scrolling through some reels on my phone and came across several “Karen” videos. It hit me.  I look like one of those women.  The young girl probably thought I was going to start something and act all entitled.

I have had women (I’m sorry to say this is true a lot of the time) get up on me and yell at me and totally disregard me.  I have had a couple put their hands on me to push me out of the way.  I have been called stupid and had my life choices questioned.  I don’t have statistics but I can guess any one in customer service has had the same experiences.  It is very sad.

I learned a few things from this encounter;
1.  My retail experiences created great empathy in me for those people working in customer service. No experience is wasted.
2.  Even if you are annoyed, it’s important to stay calm and not yell at the person in front of you who does not make the rules.
3. We still judge people by their looks. I may have made assumptions about the clerk’s blue hair and facial piercings.  And she judged me by my looks.
4.  Everyone has feelings. No matter how strong you are, they can get hurt.  Words can hurt bad!
5.  We all (including myself) can do better. Be better.
6.  Most importantly, if you are a Christian, remember the world is watching how we act.  Jesus commands us to love one another.  If more people did that, society would begin to heal.

So from today on, I will try to be a better person.  Our world needs that!

By Lois Hewitt

Please remember:

You don’t know what you don’t know.

When you look back on younger days and regret the things you did and said…

Remember that you didn’t know then what you know now….

This life is one large learning experience…

You are getting better and more knowledgeable…

Be kind to yourself…
Be proud of your progress!!

By Lois Hewitt

I don’t know about you but this has been an introspective week for me.  Life certainly gets real as you get older. You lose family and friends.  The future is a bit different. As a youth, the future is infinite but age brings a finality to it.  The body aches more often.  Leaks of all manner become commonplace. Energy needs more criteria in order to be efficient because it’s no longer endless.  Oh, and the regrets for things done and those not done. 

If you look at just those things it seems like it could be scary especially when the world we knew is so much different now.  But there is an upside. In my older years, I have gained much, and not just weight. I have gained a wisdom that is serving me well in uncertain times.  I have gained more understanding of how to be healthy which was completely disregarded in my youth. 

I love better now. I do better now.  I don’t care if I fit in or am cool.   I now have peace. Youth is fight or flight, it’s adrenaline and angst.  Those things now unimportant.  Sure I look in the mirror and see a face I do not recognize at times, but it’s a kinder face with more compassion and caring. 

Youth was about me, me and me.  Now not as much. God was an afterthought in my youth. Now He is my mainstay, my rock and my savior.  That in and of itself has been the turning point in my life. Eyes off of me and onto Him.  I know the fears of getting older.  Not having enough to live on, not having health insurance and knowing how easily your health can just go.  But knowing I have a God who is bigger than all  that is bringing me peace as I face my older years.

In my youth, I relied in my own strength and that didn’t work out as well as you’d think it would.  Now I know my limitations and I’m grateful for every provision and every day.  I miss my family and friends, miss the carefreeness of youth but the place I’m in is better, and my vision is more on the eternal.  I know getting older is full of pitfalls and uncertainties but if your eyes are looking upward, the view is pretty darn good.  Stay strong. Believe in the promises of God, I do.  It is life changing my friend.

By Lois Hewitt

In my 61st year, these are the things I ponder in my dark and sleepless nights.

My youth was led by folly. I chased the world and my idols were on big and little screens. I banged my head to music of things of ill repute. I chased money and shiny things. My mind had no filter, all that entered left by way of a wicked tongue. Anger consumed me like an ever present eternal flame.
I wallowed in depression, obsessions and addicitions.

I treated my body and my health with no regard. I slept little or way too much. I ate only things meant to kill me. Doctors gave me pill after pill to take away pain and make my body work.
What a mess I was. Those, however, were my best of days. The best of my youth….wasted and destroyed.

Now in the later years, maybe not the end but closer, I see the misturns and missteps. I see my youth has all but slipped away.
So now in these later years, I see my biggest mistake was ignoring God.

I lived for myself and endured the fires I created to come out the other side as a different person. Wanting desperately to fall to my knees at the feet of Jesus and beg for His mercy. Wasted was the best years, now only left with the rest. Jesus opens His arms and says “Come my child. I will give you rest.” Oh how unworthy I am to sit at His feet, yet He calls me child. He cares not what brought me here just that I got here.

I lay awake at night reliving the past, but it is my future with Jesus that replaces what was with what is. The person of my youth gone and a new person born willing to make now the best. It’s never too late, my friend, to turn it around. It’s not too late to make now the best.