By Lois Hewitt

Blessings come in unexpected packages.  Gifts of love appear out of the blue.

My life has been a series of missteps, bad decisions (not all but a lot), self-preservation and outright ignorance.  Mistakes, as they say, I’ve made a few.

As the years rolled on, I became more and more aware that my behavior was no longer “cute” as it turned the corner to pathetic. 

By then, the habits were ingrained. I had no willpower to change or knowledge of how to.

That’s when the grace of Jesus stepped in.  Finally the day came and I had to face up to my true reality. It was not a good day.

But with His help I started to be aware of the addicitions and the compulsions. I learned my triggers.  I began to understand why I was who I was and how to improve that person.

I’ve said it many times, I became a new person. But that’s not a truth.  I’m still who I was but now healthier and working toward better.

That’s what life is.  I did not have the wherewithall in my youth that I have today. I did not have the tools I possess today.

All those misspent years where the training grounds for where I am today.

As the new year starts, we, as humans, tend to look back.  That’s fine if you don’t stay there too long.  There were lessons learned.

Look back only to refresh the lesson.  Most of us have already beaten ourselves up enough that we don’t need to keep doing that.  If you learned from it, and moved on from it…you are a Victor.

My life is in its new phase. I phase of uncertainty yet filled with more hope than I ever experienced before.

For most of my life, I thought if I ever got cancer that I would just curl up and die.  Well, I got it and I didn’t. It just goes to prove you don’t know how you will react until you have to react.

All that came before, steeled me for all that is to come. So goes life. All the lessons learned, all the experiences and all the mistakes work toward today.

Today I sit here humbled that I even made it this far.  That I did not alienate everyone from my life and that I am loved (which I didn’t see as possible for years).

My blessings overflow. Not in gold or trinkets but in care and concern.  Not in money but in time.

My faith has been tested and will continue to be.  Some days I’m a warrior and others I am a scared child. Some days I’m both. 

We have to learn to embrace life and all its uncertainties. Embrace the unknown. Have faith that there is a plan.

Some say it isn’t possible for Jesus to care about our small, insignificant lives. I used to believe that. But I don’t see it that way anymore.

Our lives are not insignificant. They are intertwined with all the lives around it.  My actions cause ripples that touch those I know and some I don’t.  The same is true of you!

Our lives together form a huge tapestry of patterns that are sewn together with everyone else’s. And Jesus is the tailor that puts it all together.

As random as it seems at times, there is a pattern we just can’t see for now.  You are important to this design.

Your mistakes do not define you. And you can always overcome, not by your strength but by His.

If you sit at the feet of Jesus, He will give you strength. He will not leave or forsake you. Truly “what a friend we have in Jesus” who covers us in His blessings.

By Lois Hewitt

Did you ever love doing something but life got in the way of it? I used to love baking. But it made me fat and I never had enough time, so I haven’t baked regularly for a while.

I finally decided that I was going to bake again…with a few differences. Healthier, that’s the most important change. And make better choices, not just cookies.

So today I made a batch of whole grain cookies (sounds awful but are very good), a loaf of Einkorn bread (Einkorn is going to take a minute to get used to), made homemade waffles for the days I work outside the house, and a pizza from scratch.

Not super foods by any means, but better choices. Less processing and cleaner ingredients. Less money than premade. And I enjoyed it!

So I’m trying to make nutrient dense meals in an attempt to fight my cancer but sometimes I want a cookie or a piece of toast. It’s all about making better choices. As I learn more about nutrition, my choices will change but its a start.

I have my first regular CT scan in March and I don’t want to see any cancer growth.

Part of my fighting cancer plan is more peace. I had peace today up to my elbows in sticky bread dough. I had peace making a fun dinner for Mike and me. I had peace today knowing my choices are much different now.

I am praying for guidance on other things I need to change. I’m anxious to do more but I know you can’t change everything at once. I have to start slow exercising but it will get easier. I need to spend less at the grocery store. I need to learn to not stress. It will come, I know it will. And, hopefully, with it will come better health.

I guess we cannot discount the affects of doing something you love to do. It feeds the soul and I’m all about that now. I ran around so busy all the time, worrying about everything, always wanting more than I had, and never feeling like my soul was full…it was always longing for something that shiny baubles could not provide.

Making my own food, obviously not growing it as I live in an apartment, but choosing the best ingredients and making them come to life is filling my soul.

Living a quiet, simple life is good for me. Reading my Bible and having regular prayer time, reading for fun, and sitting in the sun with a cup of tea are just some of the things I’m doing now.

If I sound like I’ve got it all together, know that I don’t. I still struggle especially with lower energy levels. Sometimes I’m just frozen in place with fear and anxiety, but I’m actively fighting that now. That’s the best I can do.

Is there something you miss doing? Is it something that brings you peace? Why not rekindle the romance with it and feel yourself feel better. It’s worth a try.

As the world becomes more chaotic, it becomes more important to take care of yourself. It’s okay to do, It’s not selfish, it’s very important and you are worth it!!