By Lois Hewitt

What a day yesterday was!  Four days post surgery and I felt good.  Good enough to fold some laundry and do some work from home.  A few other things while Mike was out running errands.

Pain pills….did not need them, until I did.  I overdid it a bit.  Not bad, no damage done but a reminder of my stubborn streak.

Why are we so hesitant to relax?  Does it mean we are lazy?  Or not motivated?  How many times have we all run around doing, doing and doing when we should have just stopped?

Self-care is the buzzword of this era.  Take care of yourself.  Make time for yourself. But do it in between other things.  Don’t do it too much!  Don’t be lazy! 

We feel guilty for slowing down.  I know sloth is one of the seven deadlies, but that’s not the same as taking care of yourself.

When did it become the norm to just run ourselves ragged?  Then when you do go to relax, your brain starts calculating all the things you should be doing.  So you are “resting” but your brain is on full throttle, and you get up even less refreshed.

Even God took a day off and He calls us to do the same.  We aren’t meant to run on caffeine and no sleep.  It is bad for the body, brain and soul.

If I were completely honest, in the months before my surgery I grew more ill daily. Simple tasks that I did everyday took three times as long. Rest never helped and I would beg God for some “time off.”

Well I got it after the surgery and I still could not enjoy or utilize it. I still felt I had to do something as my worth is sometimes reflected in my completed to do list.

Today I realize I am wrong. My value is not in the number of tasks I complete. Although one wants to be productive but it’s not the sum of you as a person.  My value is not reflected in the jobs I completed.

I am a child of God.  That’s my worth.  He has called me for a purpose.  He shows me the path.

My planner keeps me organized but it became like a bible to me.  The more I got done the better I thought I felt about myself.  But it turned out to be empty.  I wasnt taking care of myself and the reality of that is I grew ill.

The fine line is the hardest walk you can ever try to navigate. Following God’s calling while doing those things humans need to do to survive.  It’s like a tightrope walk over the Grand Canyon.

This illness is teaching me that I’m not Wonder Woman.  I’m not going to “have it all.” I’m not bringing home the bacon….(those who know, know lol).

I’m going to fall short no matter my level of motivation.  I’m not getting it all done, and that’s okay.  I need to rest.  Rest is God’s way of Healing.

Self-care doesn’t have to look like a Tik Tok video with layers and layers of pampering. That seems stressful to me.  But we all need to find those things that allow us to really relax and make time for them.

Forget deadlines. Forget to do lists. Forget expectations. Just relax.  So many people look like they are on the edge. That’s what happens when you do not allow your body and mind to recharge.

I’m the first one to say this all sounds good in theory but reality plays a different tune.  I realize now that many of my stubborn choices have led me to this bed in which I am now recovering.

One thing I have learned about life, is that it will calmly and quietly call you to slow down and when you don’t life gets creative.  Like a theoretical baseball bat to the knees and bam you have no choice but to slow down.

You will be made to slow down one way or another. I choose to slow down on my terms from now on. 

Today please look for a window of time where you can really rest.  And use that time to recharge. Oh I know it will be difficult but for your own good you must try.

Redefine self-care, not by videos you see but by the things that bring you joy.  It won’t feel right at first, just do it and you will start to rewire your brain. 

You are worth the time you take for yourself.  You are worth taking care of yourself. You are worth peace and joy.  Allow it into your life, you are worth it!